AN ARGUMENT on the internet has been resolved to the satisfaction of both parties.
The conclusion of the dispute, which began in October 1998 on a message board abandoned by everyone else in 2002, has given hope to the rest of the internet.
Bill McKay said: “We’re pretty sure the argument began over The X-Files, though we actually disagreed even on that for most of 2009.
“Since then it’s ranged across Richard Dawkins, Keynesian economics, dream Justice League line-ups, the standardisation of European shoe sizes and smartphone operating systems, Godwinising a record 43,378 times.
“It’s been a full-time job, so I’m lucky that I have the kind of full-time job where they assume if I’m typing I’m working.”
Bill, also known as Flying Boy, and his interlocutor Electr0m0nk have spent 16 years locked in argument, a full year of which was spent shouting “STRAW MAN!” at each other.
The pair, who estimate they cut-and-pasted sections from every page on Wikipedia in attempts to back up their prejudices with evidence, now count themselves friends.
Bill said: “I dunno, after the thousandth time you accuse someone of an ad hominem you get friendly, you know?
“We finally settled our differences, agreed that we’d both learned a lot from each other, closed the message board and moved on.
“I hope it can teach others that arguing on the internet is completely worthwhile, as long as you never give up. Never.”
I just hope no one was executed along the way for being too dictatorial.