SANTA IS SCOTTISH - IT'S OFFICIAL

[garp_02]

Well not exactly official.......but I have compelling evidence to support my theory, as you will see.

We usually leave a little drink for Santa - in Scotland it's traditional to leave a wee whisky to warm him up on his travels.

And we leave him something to eat - maybe a cake or biscuit or cookie.

So.........Santa is a fat alcoholic.....good start!!

But there is more evidence!! 

Surely that is enough I hear you say.  But no, my friends, there is indeed more.

Santa works but one day a year - now that will be familiar to people in Dundee.

He never shaves - welcome to Glasgow.

But to top it all - religious bigotry. Santa doeesn't give presents to all the good little Muslim girls and boys....nooo!! No presents for the Hindus and Sikhs and Jews and Mormons!!

So, Santa is officially Scottish.....

A fat, alcoholic, work-shy, dishevelled, bigot - I rest my case.

Merry Christmas.

You will have noticed I have avoided Santa's tendency to visit childrens' bedrooms in the middle of the night for obvious reasons